Long Distance Relationships
Long distance relationships are something many couples may endure at some point. Whether it be going to college apart for four years or not seeing your partner for a week, there are likely always going to be extended periods of time when you cannot see your partner. However, distance is not something that should get in the way of love! There are many long distance relationship tips that you and your partner can follow to maintain a happy and healthy relationship, even when you’re apart. Below are just a few ways that you and your partner can continue to grow together in different places. We want to share some tips, but if you are looking for more support our Atlanta based therapists are here for you.
Long Distance Relationship Tips
#1: Avoid Excessive Communication
When you’re away from your partner for a long time, it can be easy to get caught up in talking and texting them constantly, as cell phones make this incredibly easy. Although it’s great to stay in contact with your partner, it’s important to remember not to be constantly texting and talking to them. Not only will this take away from your own time and the people around you, but you may find that you and your partner could quickly run out of things to talk about.
To avoid excessive communication, there are a few rules you can set with your partner before you begin long distance. First, always make sure to talk in the morning and night. When you wake up, give them a little summary of what your day is going to look like. Then, at night, you can both discuss how your days went. Some couples prefer to only talk at these times and only text for emergencies during the day. Others try to keep each other updated throughout the day to check in and see how their partner is doing. This is completely up to you and your partner, but it is important to remember to stay in the present moment and not spend too much time on your phone.
#2: Communicate with Honesty
It is extremely important to communicate with honesty, especially in a long distance relationship. A very big part of being in a long distance relationship is trust. This can be hard in the beginning since you are never going to know what your partner is doing every second, and they won’t know what you’re doing either. If you are honest with your partner about what you’re doing, you will both have an easier time trusting each other. In college, this can be tough at first as people are often going to parties. However, this is the most important time to be honest, even if your partner is unsure of you going out at first. This will very quickly establish a foundation of trust in your relationship and make long distance much easier.
#3: Remind Your Partner Often That You Love Them!
When you’re seeing your partner in person every day, it can be much easier to be reminded that they love you. Many partners show their love through physical touch, dates, and general quality time. When you’re apart, ways to show your love for each other may become more limited. It is important to not only remind your partner that you love them, but remind them of all the things you love about them and your relationship. When you are not able to show your love in person, words become so much more important.
#4: Set Up Virtual Dates
Another way to show your love for your partner when you’re apart is to set time aside for a virtual date. This could be something as simple as ordering take out and watching a movie together over FaceTime. Often when you are apart from your partner, it can be easy to get caught up in what you are doing and realize that you haven’t spent quality time with your partner in a long time. Just because you are long distance relationship does not mean that you don’t deserve to spend time together. It’s all about being creative!
#5: Plan To Visit Each Other In Advance
This long distance relationship suggestion is especially important for couples who will be long distance for a while, such as in college or for work. If this is the case, it is extremely beneficial to plan your trips to see each other in advance. This can make long distance feel much easier, as having a countdown set to when you will see your partner next will make the distance feel just a little shorter. It is much better to know when you will be seeing your partner rather than feeling as if you’re going to be apart indefinitely.
#6: Ignore Judgment
Unfortunately, you may encounter people with negative opinions on long distance. As someone who has been in a long distance relationship in college for more than two years, there are many times I have been told “This will never work out” or “You’re wasting your college experience”. Although this can get frustrating, it is important to remember that this is your life! If your partner makes you happy, then a little distance is not a reason to not be with them. Yes, long distance relationships can be hard at times. But, it can also be great and can be absolutely worth it in the long run. Ignore any judgment you receive and remind yourself that you should be doing whatever makes you happy.
#7: Remember the Positives of Being Long Distance
Being in a long distance relationship might not always be easy, so it’s important to remember all of the positives of being long distance. First, you will learn that the phrase “distance makes the heart grow fonder” is absolutely true. Being long distance with your partner will make your relationship feel so much more special because you will cherish the time you have together so much more.
Another positive aspect of being in a long distance relationship is independence. This is especially true for students in relationships, as it can be easy to get comfortable spending most of your time with your partner. Being in a long distance relationship will encourage you to get involved in activities outside of your comfort zone and make new friends.
Lastly, being long distance with your partner can make your relationship grow stronger. Long distance will be a test of your relationship at times since you and your partner will have to learn new ways to navigate difficult situations. However, this will give you the opportunity to improve your communication skills with your partner. There is definitely a learning curve to long distance relationships, but the skills you and your partner acquire will help you for the rest of your relationship.
All in all, being in a long distance relationship can be great! As long as you and your partner are open about your expectations, maintain a healthy communication schedule, and stay honest, then the distance will not come between you and your partner. Try a few of these long distance relationship tips and see what is best for you and your partner. Long distance relationships absolutely take practice, but for the right person, it’s worth it.
We know long distance relationships can be hard! If you are looking for a therapist for relationship support we are here to support you. You can reach out for a complimentary consultation call.
Thank you to Dr. Laura Riss, Atlanta based psychologist and Jane Goldsmith, Best Within You Therapy & Wellness intern for this blog post.
